Confession Of The Heart

Can you not do that? Can you please not “Like” my Facebook post or “Heart” my Instagram pic. Can you please stop showing up. It’s not that I don’t want you. I want you too much. My heart skips a beat when I think of you. My heart skips a beat knowing you’re there. I want to be more than just a friend. I want to be more than just an acquaintance. Can you not? Don’t start the fire when you’ll so easily put out the flame. Can you not make me want you when all I want is your name. You don’t see me. You see right through me. It hurts. This love. This unrequited love. This impossible love. It hurts. Running through my veins like acid. Burning me up from the inside. All I want is you. All I want is your touch. Can you not? Don’t make me fall for you when you know you were never willing to catch me. It was inevitable that I would end up loving you. I felt first. I felt only. Can I not? Give up. Push it aside. Just let it go. Can I not leave you alone. Can I not do this. To myself. Can I not blame you for my heart wanting you. Can I not just pretend. That your “Like” is just a “Like” and your “Heart” is just a heart. Can I not pretend that you care. As I lay my bleeding heart bare, I confess “I Love You”

Proud Daughter: Happy Anniversary

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The Parentals circa 2007

Good Morning Peoples, it’s a great day today. The parentals anniversary. I know they won’t see this post because this blog isn’t exactly “parent-friendly” but that doesn’t mean that I can’t allow you people to inbox me “Happy Anniversary” messages #eeekkk #bombarded.
They have been married for 31 years and I have seen it all. Witness to fights and frustration. I was there and most of the time front and centre. I also experienced the good, the fantastic. I’ve seen how they’ve been supportive of one a other and I’ve beared witness to their love. They are a true inspiration. Happy Anniversary You Two Crazy People ❤💋

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Fun Fact Friday: Advance Posts

As you know,all my posts are done from my phone #samsunggalaxynote4 and most of them,like 98% are done on the road, on my way home from work. My brain is too fuzzy to function so early in the morning, I’m talking about 4:30. And due to going through a typing block,much like writers blog, I have decided to compose my posts in advance. Like sometimes 2 weeks in advance. I don’t post everyday but I like knowing that I willl always have something to say. Also, I only try to publish my posts when I am at home because, duh! FREE WI-FI:)

At this point in time this is what I have going on. These are my drafts for the new & improved SUPERbusyMOM 2.0

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The Motherhood Diaries: Waiting & Dating

Good Day My Lovelies 😙 I hope you’re well and slowly easing into the Easter-ness that will be happening soon. This post is something that doesn’t so much as bother me but it is something that is always in the back of my mind; creeping up at the most random of times.

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Dating. Me. Single. Mother. Dating. Waiting. When.

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I am lonely. I crave that compassion. That feeling of having someone. Having this emptiness in my heart, in my gut; be filled by something, someone. Not just any old Samuel or whatever. A someone. To know. To hold. Now, some might say that I am naive, desperate and foolish. I am not. I am not throwing myself at any guy that comes around. Well that’s because no guy is coming around. Not even one.

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No one. Do you get that? Not a single male human being. Not one. Not only is that seriously sucky but it makes me question the powers that be. Why not me? All my single mothering friends are with someone,and here I am. Single. As. Fuck. Single. As. Fuck. Seriously. I am not,as they say, “actively” looking but it would be nice to be noticed. Something. To be acknowledged. Like a “hey girl. how you doing?” Eits. Beter as niks.

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I have,not “actively”, decided that I will no longer look. No longer seek. I will just live. Just let things do whatever it’s suppose to do. I will just be here.

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Internally, deep down, 5 years from now Athena has already made peace with the fact that she will have another child by the time she is 30 and that, just like the first time, she’ll be alone. Raising her child on her own.

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